Thursday, October 28, 2010

On the page margin of my roommates desires

Everybody wants something. My roommates want girls. I...well that letter describes far more then I currently am. And that is a sad part. It describes what I was...and what I am now. So. I want one girl. One single girl. And this is my shout out in the wilderness, my animal like, brutal, primal shout for this weird concept called world. This shout shall be my very last words spoken like a man.
Man- the utmost uncomprehensdable thing on the face of this planet in whose secrets you and I have countless hours, days and months of experience and still do not know how to control one, and only one, man: ourselves.
Death really fascinates me. It is something that you don`t want and still long for.
This free-writing stuff is really good. I love you. Those guys who first did this were genius. I mean I can just write here any crap that comes through my mind and it still has something of value in it.(wow beer really does boost my ego). I`m not really good at this yet, cuz normally i should not use any commas, fullstops and stuff like that, but for a mind of (a person who is becoming) an engineer that is pretty harsh. Like to put it in a tad simpler fashion it is like being a bus driver for 20 years and then suddenly you wake up that you are driving a tiny car. Two camels and a tiny car. Hah! I just owned you all. Well you pretty much know this if you are watching Ray William Johnson if not skip this part (-:. That inverted smiley stuff is really cool, If you put the inverted one and the normal one you`ll get a picture of love and peace. Like lookie:

(-: :-)

they are like laying back in the grass and being happy or anything like that. Most probably loving each other. Wow! This was the subject I wanted to write about before I took the sudden decision of doing the free-writing stuff. So love. I love. You love. I loved. You loved. We all know what it is and that is why it does not and can not have a definition. It is a function that unites two persons until they get to the global maximum point and then suddenly it falls to the global minimum point and afterwards, if it still lasts, it escalates between local maximum and minimum points. Basicly math`s crap. That is how I would want to define love. But sadly it`s other math`s crap. It is a fucking constant function that has the value of plus infinity. This is my definition of love. The other one(the max and min thingie) is only due to personal stupidity. I shall elaborate. Most probably you are not reading this by now so I can be free (like i was up till now, but now at least i am ok with it). Personal stupidity is the only thing blocking humans from being exalted in love. You put your own stuff before your love. And that is when you reduce infinity to a nuisance. Like dudes and dudetes! we do what mathematicians have sleazy dreams of. Awesome. And you know what is also awesome? that fact that I fucked up my life in such a way that if you look at it from the outside you`ll think that i have improved it.
P.S.: I love you! (good movie, and probably for whom it is intended shall not read this)

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